Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Confessions of a Closet Novelist

Gryphon on a wintry morning at Woodbine.
It's been almost a year since my last post, must be time for an update on the late, "great" novel, right? Guess what? I lied. I'm editing again. More like, hacking it to bits and rewriting, thanks to the inspiration of a self-published novelist who has actually boldly gone where I've never gone before, haha. Every other week I sit back and think, why am I bothering? Why not just scrap this, keep it as what it is - my own story indulgence, to satisfy the kid in me who was never satisfied with what she read? Half the time I hate what I'm writing, I'm not sure I recognize my characters anymore - or like them, for that matter - and it all seems kind of pointless. It's hard to stay motivated, so I admit I'm struggling big-time. But part of me is still that kid who is never satisfied with any horse book she's read, and wants to write that book.

Anyway...I'm plugging along in my closet questioning this novel's existence. The best part is, when I have serious writing avoidance, I paint, so I've been getting more painting done! Maybe one avoidance will feed the other.